SPECIAL POST

Oh my word. So many posts! 

Well, I have been brewing on this, and today it came to a very interesting conclusion.

It is "Coming Out Week" at UB. Basically about gay, bi, trans-gender rights and freedoms. Today there was a drag show, as is usual for UB this time of year. The interesting part was not the show, since I didn't go (I couldn't care less about what happens at UB, since I hate this school), but the interesting part was the bible thumping preachers with the police around them on the spine. Located in between the Commons and Knox, in the courtyard between Baldy and O'Brian Halls,  these 2 (a male and female holding signs about how the love of Jesus Christ turned gays  straight), screaming their preaching, while other lashed out at their closed minds and stupidity, university police standing to the side just incase. 

So why such strong feelings?

Let me clear the air first. I am a raised Roman Catholic, went to sunday school, confirmed, then decided "Fuck the church". It never held any of the answers and I found it boring. Nothing that was ever preached ever meant anything. I just did the song and dance cause my parents wanted me to. As of right now, I am an undecided, though I think every religion has it's good points.

Most of them are wrong.

I am not a gay hater, though most people seem to be. I figure, what ever makes everyone happy. The  love of my life is bi. Just ads flavor.  I do, though, think that they should be treated like human beings, and not like a disease, which is what most religions  attitude toward the whole thing. 

What I seriously have an issue with is the fact that people are allowed to protest at all, and even for something this stupid.

Lets face facts; most of the people on the face of this planet are stupid. Not only stupid, but completely moronic.  No one has any idea of what they are talking about, but they think they do. They shouldn't have a right to protest, they should have the right to shut the fuck up. Go elsewhere. No one cares about your beliefs. No one cares what you think. You arn't that important. Seriously. No one cares to see you standing there, holding your sighs, waving your bible like you have some message that matters.  You know what? It doesn't. You are simply fodder for people like me to stand there and laugh at.

And oh boy, did I laugh.

It's shit like this that makes us take a step back from humanity and wonder what the hell happened? Why can some people be caring, compassionate, AND religious, while there are people like these, who treat other human beings like dirt because they believe, from a book that was just there, that they are worthless.

And this is supposed to be a campus of higher learning.

Kinda like Michael Moore as a distinguished speaker. It just makes me shake my head.

P.S. Love me or hate me. I don't give a fuck. Agree or Disagree, Discuss. Just don't flame or tell me I am wrong. 

Cause if you look deep down, there is something here that speaks truth to someone.

October

You know, I prolly wouldn't hate it as much as I do if Buffalo was warmer.  I mean, in all reality, Buffalo is a beautiful place, if you look over things here and there and don't actually live in the city, and if you look at it from across a body of water, but it is just too damn cold here most of the year. But hey, I think we might get a fall! 

Thankfully classes and everything end by mid december, so I don't really have to drive drive to school anymore.... just work for a few weeks after I officially graduate... But you don't care about all that shit XP

But what have I really been up to? Nothing that would surprise anyone, really. Doing art, playing with my "Star Crossed Lover", and fighting the system.

But thats it for now. Been on the computer. Yes.

Ok ok

I know I know. I haven't made a decent post in months. But I do have reasons and I plan on posting them tomorrow. Right now I am in Capen Library at SUNY UB, waiting for class, and wanted to make a quick post. I have a photo or 2 I want to include in a decent post, and clearly this isn't the time, since I am on a public computer and have nothing with me. I will learn.


Please bear with me.


X

Dude

Sorry guys. I have been gone since March (it is July already, fucking hell). So what has Dee been up to?

More art up at http://dee-sama.deviantart.com/ . Been drawing, taking trips to a large church around here, and photographing stained glass windows in the area. I will be starting a series of prints on the website that will feature the windows from churches, and I will donate part of the proceeds to the upkeep of these. Joy, another project.

I did part of my internship over the summer. I did tutoring with this very nice and wonderful lady from Tokyo. It is nice to have more friends there when I go back.

That semester is over, thank god, and now I can kind of relax and chill over the summer, except for work, and drawing work, and Wow.

Yes, I got WoW., There goes all my time (._.)

More soon!

Of Easter, and Weather...

Happy late Easter to everyone.  As for me not posting for a while, I have been busy with school, dealing with this back ass-ward winter (it's almost fucking April and we got 7 inches last night).... And my computer was out of commission for a little bit. Woke up this past Friday to a popping sound coming from the computer. I pulled out the power cord to find out that it was /sparking/. Turned out it fried the inside power too, and that needed to be replaced. Luckily I had it back by the Tuesday night afternoon.  

Haven't been going to GEO this week, had other things to get done, except for today where I am just too lazy to run over there. Next week I will be better at this. I met with my Russian Professor for tea instead.  It is nice to do, because it is nice to have someone to talk to, and it is nice to know I have a place to go for a letter of recommendation when applying for AEON comes up. Don't get me wrong, though. I do plan on being productive this morning. I need to email the head of the Japanese Department here to ask for a tutoring position next semester. I want to help American students learn how to converse properly in Japanese. Colloquial expressions, different types of "ben", and other little nuances that could be useful. I believe that learning how to speak through dialogue checks isn't practical. It teaches you how to speak in that exact pattern, not in every day society. That may be why speaking in Japanese becomes such a tedious project for some people here. It doesn't flow like other expressions are supposed to. That is what I aim to correct. I also will email the head of the ESL department here to see if I can get an internship with them as well, helping foreign students with their English. I think these will be helpful with not only me getting my degree (which I need, apparently, before I even apply to AEON), and for the job at AEON itself.  Ah, what a pain in the ass the future can be!

Been having a problem with identity lately.  Not like someone stole my identity, but more like I have this  feeling that I don't know who I am anymore.  So many realities mixing, I worry that I am losing who I am and what I have accomplished so far as to deciding what my life will be like. I suppose everyone goes through something like this, but this is the first time for me. *sigh*

So, not much more news for now. Must wait till January to apply for AEON, which makes my Jan 10th leave date null and void.   A few more months will maybe put a strain on me, but I will do my best. 

頑張れ！

Of Japanese Weddings and Such...

If there is anything I should learn from blogging, it should be these very few things: No one likes it when I bitch about stupid shit, and no one likes me when I do it at 1 in the fucking morning. So, I will try to keep away from that and wish everyone who stops by a nice time here.

This morning, I wanted to  start sharing some of the stories I have from my one time in Japan before I go back for permanent. Hopefully. The first one I decided on is weddings.

No, I  didn't get married, but  I happened to be an uninvited guest that attended a few. I was always in the wrong place at the wrong time for these poor people. In one case, the one in Gion, the bride actually thought the whole thing funny. The groom, on the other hand, seemed sick and unhappy. I don't know if my presence there changed any of that but....  By the way, thats the bride in the picture above.

I crashed, lets say, 2 Shinto weddings, both in Kyoto. I also happened to be a "guest" at a Western style catholic wedding in Hirosaka, in Kanazawa, at the church infront of which there is a very large likeness of Jesus, which makes us say that Yes, Jesus is here, and he is in Hirosaka. Boy, were we weird.  It actually all started after the broken leg, when I fell off the bus at Kourinbou 1, which happened to be right infront of said church. In my falling, I happened to hurt my leg a little more, screaming "Fucknuggets" as loud as a could. I then looked up and saw 2 Japanese women, their children in strollers infront of them, and Jesus behind them. I stood up, brushed my shoulders off, and gave the "Yo" with the little wave, before we departed and I broke into giggles. Only in Japan. I also happened to meet Jesus in the luggage claim area in JFK International in NYC, but that was creepy and another story for another time.

Weddings then.  Never got to see a Shinto wedding at  Ōyama Jinja, but I did happen to emotionally scar a little girl at the Shichi-Go-San Festival for asking to take her picture, and disturb a bunch of high ranking business officials making donations to the Shrine during the Hyakumangoku Festival. Boy, I make friends where ever I go!

It doesn't bother me that I was present for the special time in these people's lives. At the one in the main shrine in Gion, it is a very very famous tourist attraction, so it's natural whitey and everyone else would be there. The other one in Kyoto was at Heian Jingu, another famous spot, and every Japanese person and their brother was there, including a drunk dude (at it was 9 AM) who insisted on taking my picture for me. It is a nice picture, if it wasn't on so much of an angle. His wife promptly apologized. Only in Japan.

This one, though, I wasn't allowed near. The nice people at the shrine blocked the area off. Which was nice of them, but a pain in the butt for me to get pictures. XP 

I guess thats all for now, since class will be starting. More stories later from the Far East told by a person in Buffalo, NY... no where near the far east.

X

Honestly!

START RANT / 

I never thought that asking for a slight extension for a paper cause I WAS IN A FUCKING MAJOR ACCIDENT was such a large production. I first ask the Professor (cause he kinda has control over whats going on) if I can make up the quiz I missed cause I was at home in little more than a comatose state. I get NO reply. I then email the TA who tells me I cannot, because the class is such a large class, they won't let anyone. BUT the professor will drop the lowest quiz grade, so I suppose thats where that goes. I then say that I cannot finish the paper that is due today (well, Friday now I am informed). That week that all the other students had to do it, I was not exactly well. I could not focus for more than a few hours. My head and body hurt. I was so emotionally traumatized I would stay up in the night doing accident recreation on my headboard and sleep during the day. I didn't have the time nor the mental energy to do jack shit.

I get an email back that says that it would be unfair to the other students if they let me have an extension.

Ok. Maybe... I am missing something. Let me get this right. It would be unfair to the other students to give me an extension because I was in a 9 car pile up on a bridge that took the life of my car and could have taken me along with it, and they wern't. Well, if we want to play that game, everyone in that class, including these fuckers, are welcome to get into that car accident. They are welcome to know how it feels to have cars spin yours, to hear the noises I heard, to feel the helplessness as you wait for the next car to hit you. The waiting to get out and being trapped in the thing that saved your life. THEY ARE WELCOME to suffer the PTSD and the constant fear and pain and emotional trauma that I get to deal with now. I FUCKING WILL LET THEM. YOU CAN HAVE THIS BULLSHIT, I DON'T WANT IT.

So yes, I was just lazy and didn't want to do the assignment because I wanted to go to a party with my friends. YES, I do this to make everyone's life difficult and I love demanding special treatment to throw it in people's faces.

Because there are so many more worse things than asking for a fucking 3 day extension. / END RANT

I Am Back. With Vengeance.

Total misnomer this time. While I am back, I doubt I will be going anywhere fast.  My body still aches, and moving anywhere or being up for 20 minutes at a time hurts like a motherfucker. I did get a new car, so I am back in school (I am getting geared up to not pay attention in my GEO 101 class right now), but not to the same degree. I have a feeling I will not be making an appearance at my 3rd class of the day because, honestly, I am not going to run the 10 minutes both ways. I cant. My body wouldn't let me walk the way to the bus this morning, so running is doomed as of right now. I will be back to that class Wednesday, not like missing a(nother)  day in a bogus gen. ed. will kill me. He also puts everything up online, and I play games through it anyway. I think I will use that time to work on a paper I forgot about (In the mess of this whole thing), which is due Wednesday.

On the docket for today: making appointment with professor to discuss my internship and maybe trying to get the fuck out of dodge early. Maybe by fall? Thats if I can somehow due the shit I was going to do in the fall in the summer. That would make going back to Kanazawa so much quicker and make my time and pain here end a lot sooner. Hopefully things work? Also, I need to get caught up. I missed 2 tests last week: a quiz in music that my professor said I can make up, and a Quiz in my LIN200 class, which it turns out my professor won't email me about. This shit amuses me. No, I will not email a TA who has no control over weather or not I can make up a test based on the fact that I was in a car crash, my professor does. But, if he is too much of a prick to email me back, I say fuck it. (I emailed my TA last night. I am such a good grade whore @.@ )

It is absolutely scary shit to all of a sudden have your future staring you in the face, but I need to just do what I can. Getting out of here quick means getting back into a life I feel comfortable with and finally leaving my past behind me (where it belongs, God damnit!). Also, I can't stand the winters here anymore, and the less amount of time I have to spend driving and constantly looking over my shoulder for the next accident, the better. I don't even get angry as much anymore. Well, atleast not as much as before. I just don't get a chance. My body hurts, and in my brain there is just a constant play of the accident and knowing that if it was just me and the motherfucking guard rail, I would have my lumina back and not be in massive amounts of emotional trauma. It was the fault of the 2 morons behind me, especially the silver SUV, that all this occurred. 

Unfortunately, the law doesn't cover emotional damage from being stuck in your car cause the person who first hit me was going too fucking fast.

In Pain

Well, after that last post, quite a bit has happened. I think it was later that day that a guy ran me onto the shoulder of the 90 by the 33 because he wasn't paying jack amount of attention. That could have been bad, since going 70 usually hurts when you kiss a Jersey Barrier. But, I got by the little fucker, and promptly flipped him off and told him to go smoke another. Yes, he was acting like he was high and the fact that he moved over on me without looking or turning on a blinker just makes me feel he was stoned a little more. God, I hate driving with people who go to college.

Wednesday, though, I ended up in a major accident. That bridge ramp from UB to the 990 is dangerous at any time, but Wednesday it was covered in a layer of ice. This is what happened as far as I can remember:

The guy 3 cars infront of me didn't like the fact that the person behind him was following so close. He slammed on his breaks. The person behind him, who was following just a little too close slammed on theirs. The lady infront of me, who had a lot of distance between her and the person infront of her and me behind her, used her breaks, began to slide on the ice, and hit the guard rail. I touched my breaks, began to slide, and slid into the guard rail. 

The people behind me were going way too fast. I was going around 20 when I hit the guard rail. Speed limit on the ramp is 30. They must have been going 40. A silver SUV slammed into my car, turning my car 90 degrees. This person was followed by a green van, who slammed into my car and spun me the other 90 degrees, so I was facing the opposite way I was originally going.  After that, I don't remember much. I think a 3rd car hit me, but again, I can't remember. The fire department had to come and cut me out of my car, the car was that bent in. I was taken to the hospital. The police woman came and took a statement. She started by saying "You were in the 9 car accident, right?"

I was like um... no, I was in the 6 car. She sighed and said "Dear, that was a 9 car", to which I broke out in tears again. I escaped with bruises only (as far as we know right now), but my car is gone. 

What a wonderful past 2 weeks. I went through a tree last week during the wind storm here. Just the top part with the branches, but it still scared me shitless. So did this. Hopefully everything will be ok.

The New York State Thruway

Y'know, based on all the honking and bitching from motorists who really don't need to drive on the thruway, there are a lot of them out there who still do, and those people tend to be the most inept at driving. Some examples would be, but are not limited to; going 55 mph in the 3rd lane passing lane, going 55 mph in a 65 mph zone in the passing lane without passing anyone, not paying the fuck attention to what is going on then getting mad that others are pissed at them, the list goes on and on. Out of state drivers, stay the fuck out of the 3rd lane passing lane on the I-90 by the Walden Galleria Mall. You still don't understand that 55 = 65-70 in the 3rd lane passing lane. New York State drivers too. You people fucking LIVE with the Thruway and you still can't drive on it. Are you just moronic?

When I came back after living in Japan, one of the first roads I used to get back into driving was the 90. Actually, I think within a week of landing in Dulles I was driving up to Williamsville.  And y'know what, being away for a year and not even touching the steering wheel of a car, I was owning people on the thruway (again).  What bugs me about that is that I WAS GONE FOR A YEAR. I didn't even fucking live in the area, let alone commute on the damn thing for around 365 days!  What the hell am I doing murdering these people?!

I asked my dad one day, "Dad, why are people on the Thruway either assholes or complete morons?"

His reply: Well, when the other people began to learn how to drive on the thruway they saw that there were a huge group of people who weren't. Those who did learn began to get very angry at those who couldn't but still did. Those people eventually turned into assholes. The stupid people remained stupid.

True.

Some days I wonder what happened to Darwin's Theory of Natural Selection, cause some of these people shouldn't have survived this long. And it makes the rest of us very very angry.

So, with all the moronic bitching and people complaining about driving on it, y'know what? Don't. Stop. Spare us who do and know why we do it.  That includes most of the people who are stupid. Just stop. I, for once, would like to drive to school one day and not scream at someone, flip atleast one person off, yell about how fucking stupid and obnoxious people who go to UB are (because they really can't drive worth shit), how dumb some truckers are (hey, if the sign says "No Trucks, Busses, Trailers Left Lane", it says it for a reason), or yell about how men in huge pick-up-trucks, who can't drive them for shit, should stay on the fucking farm and find something else to make up for his lack of dick size.

Maybe I am being harsh, but I don't think so. I have been driving the Thruway for the past 3 years now, and seriously, if I can learn to drive it, everyone else can. It really really isn't that difficult.  And guess what, if you don't like the tolls, don't drive the damn thing. Shut up. There are always back roads, and we know how amazingly clean those are in the middle of winter.